The Social Network

“Don’t let them see u sweat”

That’s what everyone keeps saying

But my problem is that I have become too popular too fast

And I don’t know how it happened

Everyone’s perception of me

Is changing how I really feel about myself.

And every heartbreak is everyones business.

And I can’t find time to process on my own sickness

Everyone is talking about which post is about him.

seeking.  tryna find out if I’m alone.

But if it were up to my friends.

They would delete this damn account.

Because the public opinion is what matters.

And it seems my mind has checked out.

So I will admit I still love him

And if he decided to love me again.

I wouldn’t take him back because I’m afraid of going thru this again

And feeling so depressed that it could kill me.

I sing the same songs

I look at all the pictures.

Crying all the time

And filling days with hopeless thoughts and dreams

That one day he’d pay attention and realize that perfect is not what it seems

‘Cause it’s the seeing that’s deceiving.

Your perfect isn’t perfect

But love is all you have

And I love you

And what happens when

Your dreams are all you can believe

It would be a wonder to live in your own creation

And I realize that’s the same shit that receives too many likes.

And on the inside.

I really wanna die.

But how do I say that without getting people thinking I’m a mental issue!

I’m not crazy, my heart is broken

He took the last of my emotions

With a status message and a photo.

And yet I have to stay silent

Every status, every note

Every picture is monitored

Everyone is waiting for me to admit that I am dying inside

Everyone wants to know how I feel

Everyone wants to know what I’m up to

What’s on my mind

My heartache is interesting to everyone

And my handlers are making sure

I never own up to my own downward spiral

And there’s a storm that’s raging inside of me

There’s too much I need to say.

But instead I will just post.

“I’m emotional”

And some ignorant asshole will end up liking it..

Once again making me feel

Alone.

Advertisements

One Comment Add yours

  1. jdallen32 says:

    But there again you’re not alone you said it yourself you’re not alone you will never be alone you will always have somebody or something to look forward to just because he’s not there now does it mean he ain’t going to the same thing that you may be going through now just in a different way do you still talk to him do you still asking why do you ever see him as he moved on have you moved on that is the question you need to ask yourself quit feeling sorry for yourself quit making you quit quit making yourself cry all the time to guess what if I cried over every guy that left me or if I cried over everyone that I left I wouldn’t still be here today god only knows what’s going to happen and so does your heart but you gotta listen to your heart and what it says cuz when you stop listening to your heart that’s when you go insane that’s when you become a mental case that’s when you go crazy that’s when you lose everything and then when you lose everything you start over again and again and again it doesn’t stop it’s a life cycle you can blog about this all day long you can tell people how you feel all day long wasn’t they care or whether they don’t its up to you it’s up to you to make that change not them not your friends you you gotta make that change change if you can’t make that change then guess what all hope is lost but note but no hope is not lost if you can find your heart again and you will find your heart again I’m not going to promise you nothing I’m not going to promise you the world I’m not going to promise you life itself but its going to get better and if you don’t mind I would like to say a prayer for you I hope it gets a lot better for you. Dear God please help this young man get through what he’s going through make his life as good as you can make him realize that life will get better make him C everything in his life that he has done that he is achieved or that he has not achieved show him the path that he needs to take and make his life just a little bit better for him dear God I pray in your name Jesus Christ amen

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s